Episode 3 - Officially Boyfriends

[Dial Tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Pickup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Pleased] Hey boyfriend. Since we're boyfriends now.

So... I just wanted to tell you that was definitely the best weekend of my life. I'm only sorry we had to end it so we could go back to work.

I hope you have a good day today.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Also, I STILL can't believe you hadn't seen Priscilla. What kind of gay are you? You're lucky I showed it to you in time, otherwise someone would have to confiscate your gay card, and then what would we do?

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Oh my god, I know right? Now that I have seen Priscilla, I'm as astounded as you are. You'd think that would have been some formative shit for me. Although... I think if I'd seen it as a kid, my parents would have blamed it for making me queer. So maybe it's better this way, since I get to see it with my cute bear boyfriend, and thus there's no negative associations.

Also, this is probably weird, but do you know I intentionally didn't pick up your call just before? I wanted to to listen to your voicemail instead. I feel like... I feel about your voicemails the same way I feel about getting parcels in the mail. It's like receiving an old school love letter or something.

I really like it. I really like you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey. I really like you, too.

I know exactly what you mean about the voicemails. Love letters are a good comparison I think. The way I feel when I see the voicemail notification is definitely the same way I felt about getting notes from crushes in high school.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: You got notes from crushes in high school? That's adorable! I bet you were popular. Did you get notes from boys and girls? Did you ever write back? I need to know more about Kane the high school heartbreaker! Please leave me a message with all the details.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Amused] I don't know what details you're after, here. Yes, I got notes from boys and girls, and yes, I wrote back sometimes. I wasn't really popular... just average, I think. I think maybe our school just had a romance with romance, you know?

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Sighs] Kane the teenage dreamboat. I'm definitely going to pester you for more details about this at some point. I didn't really date much as a teenager so I'm just going to live vicariously through your awkward stories, okay?

Also, I think every high school has a romance with romance, there isn't a high enough percentage of asexuals in the population to stop that from being the case.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Amused] Hmm, I suppose that's true. Teenagers do tend to have a lot of feelings.

Considering we've stopped using voicemails purely as "hey, call me back" messages, it does make me wonder how we're going to deal with it if we actually need to talk to each other over the phone.

I guess we could text first... [Realisation] Or, well, I guess we can always say straight up in a voicemail that we need a callback, since that's kind of what voicemails were originally made for... I suppose that would be the logical answer, apparent to people who don't overthink things like I do...

Anyway. I should get back to work. Talk to you later.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Amused] Good to see you eventually came up with a solution to that terrible problem.

So, text first or request a callback in case of an emergency, got it. Although, let's not have any emergencies. The only emergencies I'm allowing are party emergencies, where the emergency is that we have to party. Those, I will allow.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Amused] Party emergencies, huh? Heh, a party emergency isn't likely to come from my end. I'm more likely to have a "I desperately need cake" emergency. So I guess you'll have to keep an eye out for any cake texts from me, instead. Maybe the two emergencies will coincide sometime, who knows.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: So... what you're telling me is that if I bring you cake, you'll come out clubbing with me again? Because frankly, you're hot and I want to show you off to like, the entire gay community. Maybe hold up a sign that's just like "that's right fuckos, he's mine!".

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Amused] Hey, so, I'm not sure about the sign, but if you bring me cake, I will definitely go clubbing with you. But not too late, okay? I turn into a pumpkin at midnight. I'm like Cinderella. Or... Cinbearella! [Pleased] Hah!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: That was fucking terrible and you're fucking terrible. You're lucky I like you.

Text me with what kind of cake you want.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

Priscilla: Queen of the Desert, is a real Australian film about drag queens and road trips.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 2 - Flustering Flustertash

[Dial Tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Pickup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey, it's Jason! I told you I'd be the first one to call after our date this time!

I had such a good time last night. You know, I never actually did the whole making out at the movies thing as a teenager, probably from being the only gay in the village when I lived in the sticks, but anyway, now I seriously think I was missing out. It was a good cherry to pop with you, though.

You're a really good kisser, in case I haven't already told you that. A lot of guys get overexcited and it feels a bit like they're trying to eat me. But you take it slow, and you sort of wade into it rather than throwing yourself into it all at once... and that's a huge turn on, actually. Like, every time you kiss me I want more, because you like... draw me in rather than push against me. It's intense and soft at the same time. I love it. I want to do a lot more of it.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Flustered] Wow. I... hmm. I'd love to leave some kind of smooth and sexy message in reply to that, but honestly I'm... just... [Intake of breath] Yeah. We should do more kissing. Definitely.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Oh my god Jason, I just went to listen to that voicemail again and apparently you left it at four o'clock in the morning?? What the hell?

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Amused] Hey. I stay up late a lot, what can I say?

And you were on my mind... While I was staying up late. Thinking about you. You and your kissing, and your body... which is amazing, by the way, and you should show it off more.

Hey, I know, there's a underwear party coming up at the Laird this Monday, wanna go with me?

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Oh jeez. I don't know if I feel brave enough for an underwear party. Cis queer guys can get a little weird about guys like me being around in situations like that.

Even if I was brave enough, though, I can't really do Monday. I'll be exhausted from work and I'm probably just going to want to blob on the couch and watch netflix.

I could do... casual relaxing Monday thing, or I could do a party on the Saturday before, if either of those options work for you? Or we could do both, if you wanted to stay over on Saturday with me. Hell, you can stay over all weekend if you like.

I mean, you don't have to do that, like, stay with me all weekend, I mean - I'm definitely okay with just the Saturday or Monday night. It was just an idea, whatever works for you is fine!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey, I'd love to spend the weekend with you. That sounds really, really nice. Just let me know what time to come around on Saturday.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey, it's me. Are you sure you're okay to spend that much time with me? I mean... I'm a real homebody and I know you're into much more active and wilder stuff. I don't want you to get bored with me or something, I don't know.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey... I definitely want to spend that much time with you. I don't think I'll get bored. I kind of like the quiet moments with you.

Look... I know we only met to hook up, but like... I'm really into you. I mean, you're right, we're totally different. You're not the sort of guy I'd have gone looking for in a boyfriend, but you know what, I think that's kind of good, in a way. I've dated some real arseholes, you know? So I clearly don't really know what's best for me, you know what I mean?

But you feel... good for me. I feel good when I'm with you. I feel like we balance each other out.

Plus, you're like, really hot.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Uh, hey, it's me again. Look, I didn't mean to say that we're boyfriends, you know? I mean, we haven't talked about that. That word hasn't come up.

And that's fine! I mean, it's fine that it hasn't come up. It's also fine if you don't want to be boyfriends! We can just keep things like, cool and casual. We don't have to do, like, the relationship thing, if that's not your thing, you know? Like... whatever you want, or think, or whatever, is totally fine. No pressure here.

Like, I'm kind of sorry I even said that, now? I didn't mean to sound, like, clingy, or whatever? So, like, yeah, uh, sorry for saying boyfriend. I mean, even though I didn't actually call you my boyfriend, I just said that I wouldn't have looked at a guy like you for a boyfriend. Which... that sounds bad. That's not...

What I mean to say is, it's not like you'd be a bad boyfriend! I mean, I'm not saying we couldn't be boyfriends, like, I'm not saying that you're not boyfriend material or something, you know? Because you totally are boyfriend material. Like, seriously. But I mean, not unless you want to be, you know?

So, uh, don't feel pressured, you know, either way. I definitely didn't mean to say boyfriend. Unless you do actually want to be boyfriends, in which case, like, we can totally talk about that! But don't feel like, you know, I'm necessarily looking for that? I'm totally cool with keeping things casual, or not, or whatever.

[Quietly, to himself] Fuck, stop talking.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey so... that last voicemail was kind of confusing? I'm not really clear on whether you're trying to say that you want to be my boyfriend, or if you're trying to say that you definitely don't want to be my boyfriend.

So, uh... you know, asking directly, do you want to be boyfriends?

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey, it's Kane. Um... I didn't hear back from you yesterday, and I'm just wondering if I did or said something wrong, or if you're just not interested in hanging out any more? It's totally fine either way, I'd just like to know.

And... if I did do something wrong, I'm really sorry.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey Kane, it's Jason. Sorry for... everything. The weird voicemails, and then not getting back to you... I'm really sorry for disappearing like that.

You didn't do anything wrong. I'm the dickhead. I kind of freaked out, and instead of being a grown up about it and dealing with it, I just kind of... withdrew and avoided the whole thing. I... I won't do that again. I'm really sorry.

I... would still really like to come over on Friday, if that's okay? I totally get it if this has kind of soured you on me, though. Yeah. Let me know.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey, I'm really glad you're okay and not mad at me. I'd still really like you to come over on Friday. We can talk about whatever it is that's freaking you out, yeah? Figure out some way of dealing with it. I'll let you know when my shift finishes exactly and maybe we can meet after work and go home together.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey... yeah, that sounds really good.

Also... [deep breath] Yes. I would like to be your boyfriend.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey. I'd like to be your boyfriend, too. See you on Friday.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

The Laird Hotel is a real men's only gay pub in Abbotsford, Melbourne. It is the longest running men's only gay hotel in Australia. You can check them out at lairdhotel.com. And yes, the first monday of every month is the Underwear Party!

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 1 - First Date

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Pickup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hi, it's Kane. I just wanted to say I had a lot of fun last night, and I'd like to do it again, if you're keen. Give me a call back and we'll see if we can find a good time.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey, Jason here, sorry I missed your call. I had a really good time too, and I'd definitely like to see you again. You ever go to the Greyhound Hotel? It's a gay pub-slash-nightclub in St Kilda. There's a drag show tomorrow, which is always amazing as well as good tunes and dancing. Maybe I'll see you there?

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey, Kane again, looks like I missed you again. I haven't been to the Greyhound, but it sounds like it could be fun so I'll give it a shot. I'll see you there!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hi Jason, it's Kane. I just wanted to say, normally clubbing really isn't my thing, but I actually had a lot of fun last night. Thanks for showing me such a good time.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey, it's Jason, playing phone tag with you again. We're clearly very bad at actually answering our phones. Anyway, I had a really good time last night too, and you're a lot of fun to be around. To the point I'm kind of surprised to hear that clubbing isn't normally your thing, because you definitely kept up with the best of us. You can pick what we do next time though, that seems only fair.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Flustered] I mean-- if you'd LIKE to hang out again, sometime, obviously. If you don't want to, then don't worry about it, I won't take it personally! I'm not, like, assuming that we'll be going out again. I don't want to pressure you or anything. Don't feel, like, obligated or whatever.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey... so... those last voicemails were weird. I'm sorry about that. Uh... I'd like to see you again, if you'd like that too. Yeah.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Amused] Hey, it's Kane. You're pretty cute when you're flustered, you know. And... yeah, I'd love to hang out again. How about something a little more one on one this time. Coffee and cake sound good?

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey, uh, it's me again. Yeah, coffee and cake sounds really good. I'm free like... all tomorrow and the next day? So just... text me the details, and I'll see you then!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey! Sorry if I'm like... too enthusiastic about calling after we see each other, like... I know so far it's always me that calls first, the very next day after... usually in the morning. And here I am doing that again... right now. Uh... yeah.

But, you know, in my defence, you're cute, and I really like being around you. So... yeah. Yesterday was really nice, and I'd like to see you again, if you're up for it.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Shit, I'm so sorry I keep missing your calls. It's 100% on me. I don't get up till like, after midday, and my phone's always on silent, and yeah... I suck, I'm sorry. I would really like to see you again though, so... we should do that.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey, it's me. Don't worry about missing calls. My phone's always on silent too - I mean, you may have noticed that you had to leave a message for me when you returned that call.

Besides, I've kinda started looking forward to getting your voicemails. Which is probably the weirdest thing anyone has ever experienced, I mean, who gets excited about voicemails? Most people don't even listen to or leave them, let alone look forward to them.

But, well... I like your voice, and I like hearing from you. So I look forward to voicemails, like some kind of bizarre cryptid.

So, anyway, my point is - don't feel bad about missing my calls. It just gives you a reason to call me back, and if you miss me too, leave me a message. Apparently, I like that.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Oh, I forgot to say, how do you feel about the traditional dinner and a movie next time? The queer film festival starts in a couple of days, and there's bound to be a lot of interesting and relevant stuff on then. And we can always afterparty if we go to a big enough showing. I know you love your parties. Hell, maybe opening night?

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: The film festival sounds like a great idea! I've always meant to go to opening night but never gotten around to it before, so I'm definitely on board. You want to just buy the tix and I'll pay you back? Or I can pay for dinner if you'd rather split it that way.

Also... I know what you mean about the voicemails. Whenever I get the text saying I have a voicemail, I get this stupid grin on my face because I'm hoping that it's you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey, I emailed you the tickets for tomorrow night. I'm down with you buying me dinner in return, too. Where do you want to go for it? There's a couple of good places nearby depending on what you're into. My favourite tapas place is nearby, although it's difficult to get into on short notice, unfortunately.

Eh, I'm sure we'll find somewhere. How about we just meet at Fed Square at like, seven, and decide where to go from there?

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey, yeah, cool. That's a good idea. I'll see you tomorrow at Fed Square then! I'm really looking forward to it.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

The Greyhound Hotel was a real St Kilda gay and drag venue, though sadly it has closed since the writing of this episode.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

[Music fades out]

Episode 0 - Trailer

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Dial Tone]

[Pickup]

KANE: Hi, you've reached Kane Baxter. I'm not available at the moment, so please leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I can.

[Beep]

JASON: Hey, my name's Jason, I got your number from Boris. He said you were my type and single, and I thought, screw it, why not give you a call. Want to meet up sometime and see if we hit it off or whatever? My number's 0456 038 767, hit me up if you're interested.

[Hangup]

[Dial Tone]

[Pickup]

JASON: Hey, it's Jason. Leave a message.

[Beep]

KANE: Uh, hi, it's Kane! I actually kinda thought Boris was kidding when he asked if he could give my number to someone, so I was kinda surprised to get your message. Um - I'm glad to hear from you though! I'm not normally one for blind dates, but sure, let's give it a try.

Um, in case you need my number again, it's 0456 039 068. Although I guess... you probably already have it... since you were the one who called me first. Anyway, uh... yeah. Call me. If you like.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck, a story in voicemails will launch on the 19th of September, 2017. Check out our website at loveandluckpodcast.com, or follow us on social media - Love and Luck Podcast on Facebook, and @LoveLuckPodcast on twitter. Subscribe to us on your favourite podcast app to be first to listen!