Episode 48 - Justice

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ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

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VICTOR: [Frantic] Jesus Christ, Kane, please call me back. It's been over an hour now since you left your last message to me, and we're all really freaking out. Please let us know that you're okay.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Tired] Hey, Victor, it's me, Jason. We're... we're okay. Or... something like okay, anyway. We're headed back to the Best of Luck now.

We found the people who have been hurting us. They made us real quick, pelted a brick at me. It hit me, but it didn't do any real damage. But when Kane saw that, he... well, he lost his shit. He... well. It doesn't matter what he did. [Tired laugh] I've never seen anyone has terrified as those homophobes were, though. They literally pissed themselves. Literally! Pissed themselves! Then they dropped everything they were carrying, turned tail and ran away like frightened children.

I'm going to have a real fucker of a bruise, and Kane... he passed out for a couple of minutes from the exertion, but he woke up again and doesn't seem any worse for wear other than being exhausted, so... we're okay, and we're coming home. See you soon.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

VICTOR: Jesus christ, I take a five minute shower after spilling shit on myself and of course that's the time when you call. Kind of wish you were answering your phone right now but... if you're on your way home, then, I'll be happy enough with that for now.

I'm glad you're... well, mostly okay, from the sounds of it. But... I'm actually not surprised to hear that about Kane. Papa Bear's a gentle soul, but I've always gotten the impression he's a gentle soul in that way a guard dog is a gentle soul - real sweet and soft until you threaten the kids, and then you may as well have signed your own death certificate.

[Sighs] Well, everything's ready for you when you get home. Helen's already put the kettle on, and I've been hovering over this first aid kit pretty much since you left. See you soon.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey babe... I've just tucked you into bed... and normally I wouldn't leave you a voicemail while you're sleeping next to me, but honestly, you look like you're out for the count, and I wanted to leave you a message while no one else could overhear it.

I'll need to head back out soon and... come up with something to tell the others, I guess. Not quite sure how to turn a magical event into a mundane one. Maybe I'll say you yelled at them or threatened them or something... I don't know. Just make non committal noises when you get up if they ask you about it before I have time to tell you what I told them, I guess.

I really hope sleep makes you feel better... that was one of the scariest moments of my life when you passed out. I know... or well, I know that we agreed that it's probably just exhaustion... I mean, we normally feel tired when we use magic, and you used like... a metric buttload of magic all at once, so it's not surprising, I guess. But Jesus Christ, it was scary.

[Sighs] God, I'm starving. I think I'm going to go eat, like, half the food in our kitchen. Then I'll probably come back here and fall asleep myself for a while.

I love you. We did a good thing tonight. See you tomorrow.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Exhausted] God, I feel hungover as hell. I'm glad you're still asleep. Last night was... Christ, I'm tired again even just remembering it.

I'm sorry for scaring you. I... probably should have tried to control my energy expenditure a little better. But when I saw that brick hit you I just... I couldn't handle it. I already wanted them to stop, I was already angry at them for everything they've done. But when I saw it aimed at you... it was like I stopped thinking clearly. Or... no. I was still thinking clearly. But I wasn't thinking in logical, linear steps any more. I was thinking purely in emotion, devoid of consequences.

And then... then I took that emotion, and I threw it at them. I wasn't even trying to, really, it just... I don't know how I did it. But I took all the anger and fear they made me feel and just... forced it back into their heads so it wasn't in mine any more. Like... you know how when we soothe each other, we sort of flow that into each other? It was like that, but more... more violent.

[Upset] God... I don't ever want to do that again. I don't ever want to feel that again. I don't ever want to be responsible for that again. I don't even... I can't even think about it without wanting to burst into tears. [Intake of breath]

I should... I should go eat something. Yeah. That'll help, right? Yeah.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: I should clarify... I don't regret it. If I had to do it again, I would. You're right. We did a good thing. We stopped them. We ended it. I know... I don't know how I know, but I know... they won't hurt anyone else ever again.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey. I love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey. I love you too.

[Hangup]

[SFX: News Music]

ANNOUNCER: Hello, I'm Oliver Smith with the four o'clock news. A group of people allegedly responsible for gay hate crimes around the suburbs of St Kilda and Prahran have published a sorrowful apology on youtube, today. The group confessed to a wide variety and number of crimes, including vandalism, hate speech, and assault.

The apology included an emphatic promise not only to never offend again, but to dedicate their time and money towards reparations for the LGBTIQA+ community, beginning with donations to several relevant community groups. The organizations named in the video have confirmed to us that they did, in fact, receive sizeable donations anonymously in the past twenty four hours.

The reason for their confession and apology is not clear, and the group have declined to respond to any press enquiries. As the video and its sources are anonymous, no one has been arrested at this time.

[Fading out] Victoria Police have asked if anyone has been a victim of these people, or suspect that they might have been, to please contact their nearest police department to discuss--

[Beep]

[Music: Soothing Music]

HELEN: Hey guys, this is Helen, um... I'm speaking on behalf of a whole bunch of us who live, work or play here at the Best of Luck Bar. We obviously have told you both this a lot in person, but, we also know that you both have a weird affection for voicemails, so I'm making sure that this is receivable in your favourite medium, at the front bar.

we, We all owe you so much. We all love you so much. You've taken care of us, you've loved us, and you've protected us. You've welcomed us into your home and lives and you've nurtured us with a love and gentleness some of us haven't felt in our whole adult lives. And now, with the resolution of these hate crimes, you've made us feel more safe and supported than we ever have.

Most of us... we never thought anyone would stand up for us. We never thought anyone would care about us. We were all just trying to survive, and never thought we'd have a chance at trying to thrive. But you've given us a solid foundation that makes us feel safe.

Not only have you protected us, but you've made us feel that we're worth protecting. You've made us feel valuable. You've made us feel like we matter.

And we do matter. We always have, but we just... didn't know it, before. You made us realize it.

We just want you to know... that you both matter too. That you're both so important to us and to our community, and that we love you so much, and that you mean so much to us. We want you to know that we have your back whenever you need us, just like you've been there for us.

We just want to say, once again... thank you. We love you, Kane and Jason of the Best of Luck Bar. Our wonderful friends and guardians. Thank you for everything.

[Hangup]

[Music]

Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Victor is voiced by Darby Turnbull. Helen is voiced by Yuki Izumi. News Anchor voiced by Ben Harberts. Additional sound effects supplied by Kyle Evans. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

We would also like to thank Mary Borsellino, whose support and editing insights helped shape Love and Luck's story all the way back at the beginning, and Jessie Ngaio, whose advice and support during this project has been invaluable.

Love and Luck was recorded at the Kathleen Syme Library and Community Centre, in Carlton, Melbourne.

We would like to acknowledge that Love and Luck was made on the stolen land of the Kulin Nation. It was written and is set on the land of the Boonwurrung People, and was recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri People. We pay our respects to Elders past and present, and extend that respect to all Indigenous people who are listening. Sovereignty was never ceded. Australia always was, and always will be Aboriginal land.

With this episode, we come to the end of season one of Love and Luck. We hope you've enjoyed it!

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 47 - Hunting

ROSLYN: This episode of Love and Luck contains discussion of homophobic violence. Please, take care of yourself.

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ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

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KANE: Hey honey... it's good to have you home. I keep wandering upstairs just to make sure that you're really here. And you are, and you're sleeping, and sleeping well from the looks of it, too. Which makes sense, because I know you haven't slept well for the past few days, but also I want to kiss you a lot, so I kind of hope you wake up naturally soon.

Ricardo seems a little unsure of us all, but that's understandable. I imagine he'll feel better once you're up. Oh, well, except for Helen of course - everyone likes Helen, and Ricardo's no exception to that. She's having tea with him and the other boys.

So, also... [A bit quieter] I've been thinking about the bigots. I know you want to just gear up and go hunt them like we're the cavalry or something, but I don't think winging it is a wise decision. If we don't have a plan, then things might go badly, and I... I don't think I'd handle that very well. I can't even really handle thinking about that. I already don't want what happened to Ricardo happening to anyone else, but I especially can't handle the idea of it happening to you. Seriously, I don't think I'd cope with that at all.

Anyway... yeah. We should come up with a plan when we get a chance, tonight or tomorrow.

I love you. I hope you wake up soon so I can kiss your face.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: So... unsurprisingly, sleeping as early as I did means I'm awake as hell now. Now I'm the one sadly looking at you in bed and wanting to kiss you but not wanting to wake you up. I mean... not right this second, obviously, because if I was talking while you were sleeping, then I'd probably wake you, and I'm trying not to do that.

I've actually stepped outside for some air for a bit. Also because out here I can talk about magic stuff without anyone overhearing. It's fortunate that none of our boarders are smokers, hah.

So... we didn't really get a chance to plan anything today. Too many other things and people happening around us. So I thought I'd use this quiet moment to do a sort of... count, I guess, of what we know we have the ability to do, and maybe we can go from there.

We know we can affect people's emotions. That's something pretty solid we know how to do. We also know we can affect... I guess "luck" is the best thing to call it. Even our wards are built on both those things as a foundation... combining likelihoods with emotional effects.

Other than that... I don't know. I don't think we've got anything else, magically speaking. I feel like we should have a much better handle on this after, what, two years of practise? But then again, it's not like there's a textbook or class or something for this shit... we've just been figuring it out as we go.

I mean... it's possible we can do other shit? But... we don't know how, or what, so... we probably shouldn't count on it.

[Sighs] I don't know, babe. It's not much. Maybe we'd be better off just using a baseball bat.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey... looks like you got to sleep again, though you'll probably wake up again in a little while anyway. When you do, I reckon we eat some food and then head out.

You're right about our magic... it's not much, but it's still something. I mean... we already established we're pretty sure we can find them. You found the bar by stumbling across it with magic, without knowing anything about it. We actually do know something about one of these fucks, and we know what kind of attitudes they hold and what kinds of effects they want to have on our area, so... I think we should be able to make ourselves magically lucky enough to find them without too much trouble.

What we do once we find them, however... [Sighs] Yeah, I'm not really sure. I'm kind of betting all our money on the emotional magic card. I figure... or, I hope, I guess is more accurate, that we can make them just... stop hating us. Make them go home and never do it again. Because honestly... that's all I want from this. I don't want to get into a fight or whatever, I just want this violence to stop.

[sigh] Having said that... maybe you should bring the baseball bat too, just in case things go bad. I mean, we can hope they don't, but... it doesn't hurt to be prepared.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

VICTOR: Hey Papa Bear, it's Victor. Listen, we're all a bit lost here without you both. Ricardo's been pretty upset, and Helen's looking after him, but she's kind of shaky, too. We're all on edge, to be honest. I know you guys want to find the people who did this and put a stop to it but... I mean, how do you even plan to do that? You weren't exactly clear on your plan when you left. There's got to be a better way than this.

Look, even if you don't come back right now, at least let us all know you're okay. We're all really worried, and we don't want what happened to Ricardo, or Michael, or Helen to happen to you two. So call me back, okay? Okay?

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey Victor, it's me. We're okay, don't worry. We're still looking for them. Jason's sort of taken the lead, he's better at this sort of stuff than I am. Uh... you know, like, asking people for help, and looking for clues, and uh... stuff like that. Yeah.

Anyway, look, we're not coming back until either we're done or we're exhausted, but we will come back, so don't worry about us, okay? We'll be okay. We're just making sure this shit doesn't continue. [SFX: Shouting] We said we'd look after you guys and that's what we're doi--

[SFX: Bottle breaking]

JASON: (Background) Ow!

KANE: Oh my god! Jason!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

VICTOR: Kane? Kane?? Kane!!! I've dialled like three times and you're not picking up. Are you okay? What happened? Call me back as soon as you get this!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

VICTOR: Jason! Jason, it's Victor. Please, call me back as soon as you get this! We need to know you're okay!

[Hangup]

[Music]

Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Victor is voiced by Darby Turnbull. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 46 - Catalyst

ROSLYN: This episode of Love and Luck contains references to transphobic violence. Please, take care of yourself.

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ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

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JASON: Hey, good news! Ricardo's being discharged tomorrow, so I have only one more night of sleeping on this shitty hospital floor!! Then we'll both being coming home!! And then I'm going to have a proper night's sleep in my proper bed and it's going to be the best fucking night of my life!! Because oh my god, I miss our bed.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey! I'm so glad you're coming home!! Everyone else is too, there was an actual cheer from the bar when I let them know.

Also, Helen's going to be crashing in our lounge area for a few days while Eileen is with us, so that Eileen can stay in her room, and we still have the free bedroom for Ricardo. It'll just make it easier for him, rather than trying to juggle everyone around once he gets here. I didn't ask her to do that, by the way, but I'm sure you figured that out already. Girl's too good for this world.

We're finishing up setting up the room for Ricardo today - okay, actually, Victor, Michael and Brandon are finishing setting up the room for Ricardo. I've been banned because they're worried about my bad back. No one's even lifting anything heavy! They're just shuffling a few things around and making sure the bed is made and all that sort of thing! Ah well... they mean well, so I don't really mind that much.

God, I'm so happy you're coming home. I miss you so much. Seeing you for lunches and a few minutes here or there when I run errands just isn't enough... I have gotten used to having you around almost all the time. Time apart these days is just hell.

[sigh] I love you so much. See you tomorrow.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Panicked] Jason? Jason, please, call me back when you get this. Helen's hurt.

Not badly, she's just got some cuts and bruises, but... fuck. They--they were waiting for her. They followed her. They chased her. Threw bottles at her.

She's--she's okay, I mean, she's not okay, but she's safe now. Once she got back to the bar and got inside they ran off and left her alone. The wards at least kept them out and ran them off. But... but they still chased her. They still got to her. They still hurt her.

I can't--I'm not handling this very well. Please, call me back as soon as you get this. Fuck.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Kane? I'm on my way home right now. Call me back if you want, but I'm already coming. I'll see you soon.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey. Everything's okay, no new horrible thing has happened, I just... I couldn't sleep, so I thought I'd give you a call. Thank you for coming home tonight. I... when I saw you come through the doors, it was like I could breathe again. Thank you.

Helen's sleeping okay, thank god. I'm glad you were okay with putting her in our bed for tonight. I just... I needed to know she was safe. If something worse had happened to her, I...

[Intake of breath] Okay, no... no, I'm not going to get worked up again. She's okay, she's safe, she's sleeping.

I love you. I hope Ricardo's doing okay. See you tomorrow.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey. I still can't sleep.

I've been hanging out downstairs for the past couple of hours. Thinking, mostly.

[Quiet, serious] I think... I think that you were right. When you said that we should bash back. I mean, I know you didn't say that exactly, but I think... you were right. To do good in this situation, we need to consider a more aggressive move.

I still don't want to be violent. But... they're targeting us, specifically now. They targeted Helen. Helen! Of all the fucking people in the world, for it to be her...

If we can't even set foot outside the bar without having to fear for our safety and the safety of our people, then... even if the answer is violence, or even potential violence, then I need to accept that.

I think... I think I let myself prioritize my discomfort over people's safety. I shouldn't be allowed to do that. That's not... that's not doing good. That's a cop out. That's an attitude that left Helen vulnerable tonight.

We can't let them get away with this any longer. If we have the means to end it, then we should use them. No matter how uncomfortable it makes me.

I don't know what what we'll do, exactly, or how we'll go about it, but that's something we can figure out together.

I love you. I'm sorry for not accepting the truth of the situation until now.

We'll finish this.

[Hangup]

[Music]

Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 45 - What To Do?

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ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

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[Beep]

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KANE: Hey honey, are you still at the hospital? I hope Ricardo is doing well. I miss you. Do you think you'll be coming home soon?

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey, it's me. I'm going to stick around a little longer. Ricardo's doing pretty well, but he's pretty emotionally fragile, which is understandable.

I'm going to stick around until he's discharged, I think, and then I'll probably bring him home with me. He doesn't want to be alone right now, which makes sense. I asked if he had family or something, but he just shook his head and didn't want to talk about it, so I dropped it.

I don't, uh... I don't know where we'll put him exactly, when I bring him home, since once Eileen gets there, all our spare bedrooms are taken... but I'm sure we'll figure something out.

I miss you too. Seeing you for less than an hour just every now and then when you have time to come by is hard. [Sighs] Sorry for being gone so long. I just... I don't know. I feel like being here is really important, somehow. Like... if I didn't stay here with Ricardo when he needs someone, what's even the point of the bar, of trying to make the world better, if I can't sacrifice a few nights in my own bed for someone who's been through something so horrible, you know?

I love you. Talk soon.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey, it's okay. I mean, I miss you. I miss you like hell. But I get why you're sticking around there. And I mean... it's not exactly easy to be upset about "oh, my boyfriend is such a good person he wants to be there for someone who's gone through something traumatic".

[Sighs] I really do miss you though.

Oh, Pat came by today and dropped off some lollies they made, which was really nice. They said they'd probably drop by the hospital with some for you and Ricardo, too, so keep an eye out for them.

Okay, I gotta go be a responsible adult now and like, take care of my customers. I love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey, Helen offered to watch the bar for an hour or two so I could come have lunch with you, so I'm on my way now. See you soon.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Yep, it's official, I definitely miss you even more when I see you briefly than when I haven't seen you all day. Lunch felt like it only lasted two minutes rather than twenty. [Sighs] I love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey, just letting you know that Eileen got here safely. She's a bit tense, but she's having tea with Helen right now and they're having some kind of mutually calming effect on each other, which is good. I'm trying to add some magic to the soothing pot as well, so to speak.

Things are pretty good here, otherwise. Or, as well as they can be without you, anyway.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey, I'm glad Eileen got there okay, and that she hit it off well with Helen. But then again, who doesn't hit it off well with Helen?

Ricardo's sleeping better now, and actually sleeping rather than just dozing from all the drugs or whatever, so that's a really good sign.

You know... at some point, we're going to have to decide what to do about all this. We can't let this stand, we can't let this shit just... keep happening. We can't let these bigots keep hurting people. And, like I said, with Eileen's info, we now know enough about at least one of them that I reckon we can find him with magic.

We need to do something. The question is, what?

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Sounding tired] Hey... yeah. I know. I know we have to do something. Something more active. It's not enough to just clean up after the mess any more. We need to try and stop this shit before it happens.

I just... I just don't know what, though. I don't know how we could solve this. We could go to the police, I guess, but... I don't know, it's not like I've ever felt the cops are particularly on our side, when it comes to being queer, I guess. Plus there's Michael to worry about... I couldn't live with myself if he ended up in one of the detention centers.

What do you think? Because I... I have no idea.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey. I agree, I don't think cops are the best idea. I don't think it's a safe choice for us or our people, to be honest.

[Sighs] Look, babe. I know you don't want to use our powers to hurt people, I know that using magic for anything less than happy things upsets you. But... I think we should consider it. We've tried peaceful means. We've tried protecting people passively. And we've failed. There have been two gay bashings, there have been months of homophobic propaganda being posted all around our neighbourhood. People are scared, we're scared, and we're right to be.

We can't peaceful our way out of this, Kane. I think it's time to make an exception. To do the right thing, to do the good thing in this situation, I think we have to consider a more aggressive move.

There's precedent for it, in your mundanity rule, if it helps. Bashing back in order to secure the safety of our people isn't exactly an unheard of thing in queer history.

Just... don't say no immediately, okay? Give it some thought.

I love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: No. Absolutely not. We can't be a part of the violence, Jason. That doesn't solve this, it just escalates it. No.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Sighs] Yeah. I had a feeling you'd say that.

[Hangup]

[Music]

Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 44 - Eileen

ROSLYN: This episode of Love and Luck contains discussion of homophobic violence. Please, take care of yourself.

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Dial Tone]

[Pickup]

JASON: Hello?

EILEEN: Hi, Jason? It's Eileen. Sorry I missed your call, I was on the clock at work.

JASON: That's fine, thanks for calling back so quickly.

EILEEN: Are they okay? The person who was bashed?

JASON: I... I guess so. He got through surgery okay, and he's drinking water, and they reckon he'll be eating again in a few hours, so that's a good thing. He's as okay as he can be, considering the situation.

EILEEN: Jesus... I can't believe this happened. It's so horrible.

JASON: Yeah. [Sighs] So, uh... you said you might know something about the people who vandalized us, right?

EILEEN: Yeah... look, it's... kind of scary. I went on a date with a guy I met online, right? His profile seemed interesting, but in person he was... ugly. Personality wise, I mean. Physically he was fine.

But half an hour into our date, he started talking about the sanctity of marriage, and the gay agenda, and the safe schools controversy... you know those sorts of awful things.

JASON: Fucking hell...

EILEEN: Right. Anyway... I kind of... nodded and tried to look for a safe way to leave, because any guy talking like this is absolutely the kind of guy that would murder me when he found out I'm trans, right?

Like I'm not super stealth or anything, but I don't advertise it, either. So he didn't know, because it's not on my profile. I tend to wait and tell people in person.

Anyway... he kept ranting. He ended up ranting specifically about this bar in St Kilda that was... well. You know. He used some nasty terms.

He told me that him and his friends had been "fighting back", trying to let "the gays" know that they weren't welcome here, and that they'd be better off dead, and... so on and so forth.

JASON: Fuck... it was him! Him and his friends were behind all the posters and shit?

EILEEN: Posters? I mean... I don't know anything about posters, I didn't ask for details, but yeah, I mean, I guess if that sounds familiar and matches up with things you've been seeing... I guess that was probably him and his mates.

I mean... when I got home after that date, I googled for gay bars in St Kilda, since that was the only thing he said about you, and I found your website, and the note you had on your facebook about the vandalism.

That's why I called you. Because this guy had basically been boasting to me that he'd been terrorising LGBT people, and so when I saw that you'd had your bar defaced it was... I mean, that can't be a coincidence, right?

JASON: No... no, I don't think that's a coincidence at all. Shit.

EILEEN: Yeah... um. That's pretty much all I know. I blocked him on everything after the date, and I didn't stick around for long during it, I pretty much left as soon as I could make a believable excuse.

JASON: Yeah, that sounds like it was a smart move. So what can you tell me about this guy?

EILEEN: Well... his name is Roman, he has a lizard tattoo on his left arm, like around the bicep.

Him and his friends are big into nightlife stuff, they go clubbing in the city like, every Thursday and Saturday. They go to different places a lot, but I know they really like Chapel Street, which is probably how they ended up in your neighbourhood.

He's a TAFE student, I think? I don't remember what he's studying, though. I don't know... he's just kind of... plain. He's in his mid twenties, white, he has short brown hair...

I don't really know what else I can tell you. He likes to play pool... he drives a little postie bike instead of a car.

I really... I don't really know what else to say, I can't think of anything.

JASON: That's fine, Eileen. That's still really helpful.

EILEEN: What do you think you'll do? Are you going to go to the police?

JASON: I... I don't know. I still need to talk about this with my partner before I do anything. I'm... I'm too hot headed for this shit. He's the level headed one.

Hey listen, Eileen, are you safe? You said on your message that you might need some help once you told us about this stuff.

EILEEN: I don't... I don't know. Like I said, I blocked him on everything.

It's not like there was a lot about me on my profile that makes me findable, but... he knows what I do for a living and he knows I live in Frankston, and he knows my name and what I look like... I don't know.

Do you think I should be worried?

JASON: I don't know. I wasn't there with you. Do you feel safe? Do you feel worried?

EILEEN: No... or... I don't know. Maybe? I am worried. I live alone, and I just... I don't know.

JASON: If you're worried and you don't have, like, pressing needs elsewhere, you're welcome to come crash with us for a little while. We've still got one bedroom free at the moment above the bar. It's a bit cramped, but it exists. And there's always someone around in the bar, so you'd always have company.

EILEEN: I'm really tempted to take you up on that, actually. Would it really be okay?

JASON: Yes, absolutely. Look, you have our address, right? It was on the website. Go there when you're ready. I'll tell Kane to expect you. He'll get you settled in.

EILEEN: Okay, yeah, okay, I think I will. Just for a little while. Thank you.

JASON: No, thank you. Eileen, you've really, really helped us with this.

EILEEN: I guess I'll see you at the bar sometime soon. I hope the guy in hospital is okay.

JASON: Yeah... me too. See you later.

EILEEN: Bye.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey, Kane? I called Eileen and she's on her way over to the bar at some point. She's going to crash with us for a little while. Call me back and I'll fill you in on what she told me, but the short version is we now know a little something about at least one of the fuckers that's involved in this. Enough that I'm pretty sure we could find him with our magic.

[Pickup]

[Music]

Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Eileen is voiced by Abigail Michell. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 43 - Ricardo

ROSLYN: This episode of Love and Luck contains discussion of homophobic violence. Please, take care of yourself.

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Pickup]

[Beep]

JASON: Kane, don't freak out when you get this message, okay? Listen all the way to the end before you have a panic attack.

I'm fine, but I'm at the hospital. I went outside to get some fresh air before I went to bed, and found this poor guy bleeding on the ground outside our bar. He wasn't super responsive, but I got his name - it's Ricardo - and he managed to tell me that some fucking arseholes starting beating him and shouting slurs and shit.

He got gay bashed, Kane. And the fuckers left him on our doorstep for us to find.

I called the ambos and sat with him till they arrived, trying to keep him awake, and now I'm here at the hospital waiting to see if he's going to be okay. He didn't want his family called, or any friends or boyfriends or anything so I just... I couldn't leave him alone. I couldn't. So I came with him.

I am fucking fuming. As if what happened to Michael wasn't enough... now this. These fuckers are clearly not going away with some gentle thoughts from us. This can't go on.

Can't do much about it right this second... I really want to make sure Ricardo's okay before I head home. So if I'm not there when you wake up, I'm probably still here at the hospital, okay? Don't worry, I am fine, I'm just sticking around to support Ricardo for a while. I love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Jesus fucking Christ, Jason, you could have woken me up for something like this! I nearly had a fucking heart attack when I listened to your voicemail! Look, just... I'm glad you're okay, but... fucking hell.

Do you want me to come to the hospital and bring anything, or something? Call me back as soon as possible, okay?

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Shit, missed your call, sorry. I was taking a nap. Hospital chairs and floors are not super comfortable, and then on top of that there's a thousand beeping noises.

Don't worry about coming here. Stay at the bar and take care of people there. I've got this.

Oh, I gave Victor a call and asked if he could cover me tonight if I'm still here and he said yes, so, he might be around later today if it looks like that might happen.

I'm really sorry I scared you. I... you're right, I should have woken you. I wasn't thinking very clearly. I'm really sorry. I love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey... fuck, figures that the one time when we actually want to answer each other's calls we keep missing each other.

Sorry for snapping at you. I'm just... I was just scared. It makes sense that you weren't thinking clearly. Sorry.

I'll stay here, but keep me updated on the situation, okay? I love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey. It's okay. This is an upsetting thing... it's okay that we're both kinda fucked up about it.

I love you too. Ricardo's in surgery right now. The doctor said he should be okay though, so that's really good news.

Normally I wouldn't be allowed to stick around for him, since I'm not family or whatever, but... I'm the only person here for him, and he really doesn't want to call anyone. He got really upset about the idea of me leaving, when one of the nurses mentioned it. He had a panic attack, actually. I helped him through it okay, it wasn't exactly like when you have them, but I think having seen you go through them a lot it made it a bit easier for me to help him calm down.

Worst job experience ever, by the way. If I ever get good at this magic shit I'm going to figure out how to magic panic attacks away, and then I'm going to figure out how to bottle that spell and I'm going to sell it and become a zillionaire while making the world a better place all at the same time.

[sigh] Anyway... I'll try calling you again in an hour or so if I don't hear back from you soon. I love you so much. Hug Helen and Victor for me. Stay safe.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Sighs] Missed you again. I've taken my phone off silent, hopefully I'll hear next time you call. Oh, and hugs delivered to Victor and Helen. It made them both smile pretty damn big, which was a nice pick me up. They miss you too.

I hope Ricardo's surgery goes okay. Let me know how things go.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Fucking hell. We're really having the worst luck with catching each other right now.

Ricardo's still in surgery, but I'll let you know when he's out.

Hey, you know that voicemail we got at the bar from Eileen? She said she might know who vandalized our bar? I'm guessing that whoever did that is the same group of shitheads who bashed Ricardo.

I know she said she'd drop in on Thursday, but I'm going to give her a call today and see if she can help us out. Text me her number when you get this?

We need to know who did this. We need to know who to hold responsible.

I love you. We'll talk soon.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hi, Eileen? It's Jason Flint from the Best of Luck Bar, on my mobile. I'm just returning your call about the vandalism. We think the people responsible for that are also responsible for a gay bashing that happened just outside our bar. Anyway, if you can help us out at all, please return this call. My number is 0456 038 767. Thanks.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 42 - Repairs

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Pickup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey, I love you. I'm glad you're finally asleep.

I'm so angry at whoever did this. I swear if I ever find the fuckheads who vandalized us, I'll vandalize their fucking faces. How dare they threaten us like this. How dare they deface our home. Fuck!!

At least they didn't cause any structural damage, and they didn't come inside. I'm guessing our wards were a big part of that. I think we might need to put some more magic into them though, not just keeping harm out but repelling it away, too. I'll try and do some of that tonight before I come to bed.

I love you. I won't let this happen again.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Low level anxious] Hey honey. Bruce is here, touching up the scuffs on the facade that we couldn't fix ourselves. I don't know how he heard about this, actually. I didn't call him. Maybe Victor did? I should ask.

Anyway... fuck, I can't wait for every last impression of this graffiti to be gone. It makes me upset just thinking about it... and I'm not alone in that, I think. I can see folks glancing over at the front of the bar with this worried expression. We're all a bit shellshocked. I don't think... I mean, the flyers were one thing, but I don't think we expected this type of thing to literally come to our front door. [Sighs]

Everyone is tense this morning. They're all putting on brave faces, things are going ahead as normal but... I don't know. This is just... it's just scary, I guess. It's one thing to be afraid of the world out there. But, to be afraid that it might come here... [sighs]

I can't really talk much about this, because there's people all around who could hear, but... yeah, thank you for what you did last night. I'll try and put some effort into it too, as well as the more mundane stuff.

I... I was going to make cupcakes again but I just don't think I have it in me, to be honest. I feel like my legs are stuck in mud. [Sighs] I don't know. I'm just... I'm pretty shook up, I guess.

I love you. See you when you get up.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Emotional] Helen heard me leave that last voicemail for you, and so she made cupcakes for everyone since I didn't feel up to it. She drew a heart on one of them for me...

Michael is playing board games with the kids to distract them from the facade work. Tom is running some kind impromptu book club with some of the stitch and bitch regulars. Brandon and Victor are helping out Bruce, and Helen is going around clearing tables.

I really... I really love all these people. I mean, I love them all anyway, but it's easy to love people when things are easy. When things are hard, like now, to still have everyone looking after each other and supporting each other... I don't know. It's just... it's very special. I'm glad we did this. I'm very glad to be a part of this.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Softly] Hey... bedtime voicemail as requested.

I feel a lot better tonight. This has been really scary but... everyone has been so good and uplifting, that I feel like... even if more bad things happen, we'll still be okay. We'll all look after each other. None of us are alone.

I think... when we began to take people in, when we began to treat Best of Luck Bar like a real sanctuary, not just a place to hang out... I think we forgot that sometimes we need support too. Sometimes we need a cupcake, or a hug, or a break. I began to think like... like we had to look after everyone, and that we somehow had to do that alone.

But... we're not alone. Everyone has been supporting us, and looking out for us, as much as we've been looking out for them. It's become this like, self fulfilling thing. We help people and then when we need help, they help us.

And I mean... today... all of today, all the good parts of today... happened without any magic. It was just us, and each other, all together. That's... [yawns] that's just really, really amazing and positive, you know?

Anyway... I'm going to sleep now. I love you. See you tomorrow.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

EILEEN: Hello, my name is Eileen, I got your number off your website. I think I know who vandalized your property. I'll drop by on Thursday to talk to you about it, if that's all right - if not, just give me a call back and we'll organize another time. I'll drop you an email after leaving this message with my details.

[Uncertain, vulnerable] And... your voicemail greeting said you're a safe place, right? That you help people out? Because... I might need to take you up on that, once I tell you what I know.

Anyway... I'll see you Thursday, or will speak to you soon. Thankyou, Bye.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Eileen is voiced by Abigail Michell. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 41 - Vandalism

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Pickup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey babe. So, I was gonna close up, but then a group came in looking really upset. They said the posters are back... with some new, even more horrible things written on them, too, and they've been posted a lot closer to the bar.

Soothed them with some magic as best I could, and I've settled them all in the lounge area so they can crash for the night if they want to, so they may well still be here when you get up in the morning.

I am fucking pissed. I'm going to go out and do a quick circle around the block and rip down any of those fucking posters I find before I head to bed. Tomorrow me and my nellies will do a bigger sweep. And if I come across any of the fuckheads who are putting them up, I swear to god I will fuck them up.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey. Folks are still pretty rattled this morning, unfortunately. I made everyone breakfast and I think I'm going to do free cupcakes again today. I know that seems to always be my fallback, but I just... I don't know. Cupcakes might not make anything better, but they're nice, and they're something I can do, so... yeah.

I've been strengthening the wards, too - added a couple more knots to the door twine, and been throwing around a little more weight when I remember. All together it all seems to be helping a little bit - people are scared, but they're still smiling and talking with each other, so that's something. At the moment it seems it's just the posters, no more bashings or anything, but... well. It's still pretty scary.

Michael is... doing as well as can be expected. He had a panic attack when he found out about the posters being closer to the bar this time. At least I'm kind of an expert in panic attacks, unfortunately, so I could help him through it. He's on edge, but he's having tea with Helen, and she's always such a gentle presence, I think he'll be okay.

I really wish we could somehow stop this. Like... I wish we could cut this off at the stem, rather than just... bandaging over all the fear. [Sighs]

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey... bedtime voicemail again. Unprompted, this time, even. Because... [sighs] Look, I know you're going out after closing to take down posters, and that's fine. But just... be careful, okay? It scares me a little. I don't want anything bad to happen to you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey babe. I'm home again, safe and sound. I mean... I guess by the time you listen to this I'll be in bed with you anyway so it'll be obvious, but... I don't know, I still feel like I should leave a message.

We took down a lot of posters tonight. I don't know if we got them all. I mean... probably not, I guess. But we took down a lot. Hopefully things will feel a bit safer again tomorrow.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: God, it was a relief to wake up next to you this morning. My anxiety feels like it's just... I don't know. Not getting worse, necessarily, but I feel like my base level has risen in the last few weeks. [Sighs]

Anyway... things seem a little better today. People aren't coming in like they're getting out of a storm, they're just coming in to hang out, like normal.

I still... I don't know. I still feel very anxious about all of this. I feel like it's not over yet. Like we're just in the eye of the storm.

I really hope I'm just being paranoid and this isn't some kind of prophetic shit.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey, I was just reading this article online about cold brew coffee - should we consider offering that too, as well as espresso? Might be worth looking into.

I'm basically just leaving you this voicemail as a reminder, so I don't forget to look into this further, hah. I love you. See you tomorrow.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Enthusiastic] Gooooood morning! Guess who just booked a hotel room for us as a belated anniversary celebration for tomorrow night? This guy!

Victor said he's happy to cover the late shift for you, and I mean, it's a Wednesday, so it wouldn't be too busy for him to handle alone. Helen said she'd open for us on Thursday morning, too, so we don't have to rush home from the hotel right away if we don't want to.

It's not a super fancy hotel or anything, but who cares - hotels are fun. Even if we just sit around and watch TV in our underwear, it's still somehow more fun in a hotel than doing it at home.

Anyway, I know I could have just told you when I saw you but I'm excited, so I wanted to leave you a message. Love you!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey babe. It's another quiet night tonight, no one's been in for like an hour now, and I'm kind of bored, to be honest. I've been playing games on my phone so much I had to bring a charger downstairs.

I'm pretty excited about the hotel tomorrow, though! I'm gonna do so many fucked up dirty things to you. But don't get your hopes up, I'm not telling you what they are in this message. I'll show you in person tomorrow instead.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Teasing] Now who's the mean one in this relationship? Making me wake up to a message like that? You could have at least given me a taste, so I know what to look forward to.

Instead I'm just going to be serving morning tea to people and my imagination is going to run wild. So if I drop a cup or spill something on someone because I'm too preoccupied with your teasing, I'm blaming you.

I'm excited for tonight though, no matter how mean you are. Or maybe because of how mean you are.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Softly] I know I should be trying to sleep, but it's still early by my body clock.

Leaving you a voicemail while you're sleeping in the same room as me is probably not the best choice I could be making, but I'm trying to be quiet, and you haven't moved or anything, so I figure I'm not bothering you.

Thank you for tonight. It's been really wonderful. I don't know why you keep apologising for it not being anything special... it's been really special. We hardly ever take intentional time out to be together and not do anything else, these days. Not that I don't love our everyday life, I do. I don't want it to change. But it's nice to have a holiday too, is all I'm saying.

Anyway... you just rolled over so I'm going to end this here so I don't wake you.

I love you, Kane. I love you very, very much.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

VICTOR: [Nervous] Hey Jason... it's Victor. Um... there's not really an easy way to say this, so I'm just gonna... jump straight in.

I know Kane's going to be really upset about this, so that's why I called you instead of him, I figured you'd know how to break it to him without him getting distraught, you know?

I don't want him to freak out too badly about this but... well. Helen called me in tears when she opened this morning. Whoever's been posting those homophobic flyers around the area? They've clearly figured out that we've been ripping them down, or at least know we're a queer bar. Someone has spray painted hate speech and threats all over the Best of Luck's facade.

We're cleaning it up as fast as we can, but we're probably not going to be able to get it done before you get home. So... just giving you a heads up.

Sorry to ruin your morning. See you guys soon.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Victor is voiced by Darby Turnbull. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 40 - Second Anniversary

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Pickup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey honey, I hope the construction isn't bothering your sleep too much this morning. Love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey, it just occurred to me, we can use our magic to soothe each other, right? Maybe we can also use it to help each other sleep? Can't hurt to try. Anything has got to be better than you needing emergency naps through the day during any moment of quiet.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Oh man, Helen just suggested that Michael should have an exhibition here and he said he was nervous about the idea but kind of into it, so I backed her up and he agreed to do it! I'm so glad!! It's going to be great!

... Shit, we're gonna have to check our budget, because I can promise you I'm going to want to buy at least one thing he's done.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey babe. We've had a pretty good night tonight, I just finished closing up now and am gonna head to bed. I'm fucken exhausted though. I'm looking forward to you flexing your magic muscles in the morning and seeing if you can help me sleep through the construction noise. I really hope it works.

I love you. See you tomorrow.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Well, you're still asleep and the construction's been pretty loud, so I'm guessing that it worked? Unless you're just hiding out for a bit longer... let me know what time it is when you wake up so we can compare notes, yeah?

Oh, also... I tried to put some nice dreams in there for you too, while I was at it. Mostly just to see if I can. So make sure you tell me what you dreamed about if you remember, too, so we can see if that worked. It's not like it'd be a useful skill exactly, but it'd still be pretty cool, I think.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Softly] Hey honey. You wanted another bedtime voicemail so here it is. I don't really have a lot to say though... today's been a pretty mundane day. Although... it's kind of nice that even my boring days now are still, like, a million times better than they were in my life before you. I'm so glad I met you.

I'm glad you liked the dreams I gave you. Maybe I should try and give you some sexier ones next time. [Yawns] Goodnight, Jason. I love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Oh my god, Kane. Do not give me sexy dreams unless you're willing to come back upstairs and deal with the consequences of that, do you hear me? Don't make me have to get up and then work a full day before I get to make good on them. I doubt Victor would be happy to be told "hey, watch the bar for an hour because I need to go fuck my tease of a boyfriend right now".

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON & VICTOR: HI KANE!

JASON: [Enthusiastic] You joked that you expected to wake up to a voicemail from Victor and me, so, as your loyal and devoted boyfriend, it was clearly my responsibility to make that happen!

VICTOR: And as your loyal and devoted friend and employee, it was my responsibility to go along with it!

JASON: You know we're both literal people!! This is what you get for making offhand remarks!! We don't even have anything interesting to say!!

VICTOR: Oh no, just gonna bullshit our way through this. Say, Jason, how is that local sporting team?

JASON: No fucking clue, Victor! The closest I have ever been to a sport is lube wrestling in a kiddie pool!

VICTOR: Oh my god, you should come to rugby practise sometime, dude!

JASON: Fuck off with that shit! I love you but I swear to god I will dack you in front of all your rugby friends.

VICTOR: Oh, as if they don't do that themselves anyway.

JASON: Really? Shit, maybe I should go to rugby practise. Anyway, love you babe, see you tomorrow!

VICTOR: Bye!!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey! Good morning! Guess what! The downstairs bedroom is now finished!!

Bruce finished up the last touches this morning. He's packing up his stuff now, and then once Victor is here he's gonna take me to the warehouse to pick up a bed for the boys before we officially move them into it. It's a little more money to be spent, but I mean, we can't just let them sleep on the floor or whatever.

They've already put their bags in there for now. Brandon actually cried a little bit... apparently they haven't really had somewhere safe and stable to stay for a long while, and while they've been grateful for crashing in our lounge, seeing that we put the effort in to get them an actual room was a bit overwhelming. I don't think they really expected us to let them stay...? Like, I think they expected us to kick them out after a little while or something, rather than stick by what we told them, that they can stay as long as they need.

Anyway... I'll see you later today!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey babe. It's after midnight which means it's officially our anniversary, so... happy second anniversary. I love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Happy anniversary honey. I'm gonna cover your face with kisses when you get up. I love you so much.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Bedtime voicemail as requested!

You know... today was our anniversary, but we didn't really do anything for it except hug slightly more than usual. Other than that... it was just kind of a normal day. And that's... that's just so wonderful. Do you know how good that is? God, Jason, I... our normal, everyday days now are even better than my amazing days were before us, before the Best of Luck Bar.

Today wasn't special, and that's exactly why it was special. This is just our lives now, and I'm just... I'm so happy, and I love you so much. Happy anniversary, again. I'm so glad I met you, and I'm so glad I got the chance to be with you.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Victor is voiced by Darby Turnbull. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 39 - Tom and Brandon

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Pickup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Annoyed] Hey, so, we fucked up. [Flustered] Wait, shit, that's a bad way to open a message, sorry - we're fine, everything's fine, don't worry! Didn't mean to make that sound so catastrophic!

Anyway, uh, so - these two sweet boys came in today asking for somewhere to crash, because they've heard we're a safe place and can help them. They've been stuck in a shitty situation for a while, or, well, multiple shitty situations actually from the sounds of it. So, that's fine, they're here now - oh, their names are Tom and Brandon, by the way.

Here's the problem: Tom uses a wheelchair. All of our spare rooms are upstairs, and it's not like dingy little pub buildings have lifts installed into them. Fuck!! I mean, at least we have an accessible toilet, but we're going to have to get a shower installed, and we're going to have to do some kind of... something to fix this.

I've set them up in the lounge for now, but we're going to have to figure something out. I've already called Bruce to come install a shower into the accessible bathroom, so he'll be around to do that tomorrow. When he gets here we should talk to him about getting other accessibility things fixed up, which, yeah. Anyway. We'll talk about it when you get up.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Okay, so, I know I said we'll talk about it when you get up, and we will, but I wanted to leave you a message in case I forget or something. I had a thought about Tom and Brandon - maybe we could renovate the little room we're using as an office downstairs? It's not like we have a lot of paperwork or anything... we can move the filing cabinet and computer upstairs, like, maybe to that weird little nook in our bedroom that we've never really known what to do with? Almost everything else in the office is stuff that can be put into storage, so maybe we could put it under the stairwell, or something like that?

[Sighs] Ugh, I can't believe we didn't consider the fact we might need crash space for disabled people. We made sure the bar was accessible, but we didn't think about the second part of that at all! Such a fucking oversight, ugh! [Sighs]

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Softly] Hey... here's another bedtime message for you. Thank you for helping me calm my tits today. I just... I kind of got into a spiral about the whole thing. I'm still kind of upset with myself for not thinking about the possibility, but, you're right, we can't change the past. But we can fix it from here.

You know, I think it'll actually work out better to have the computer and filing cabinet upstairs anyway. Half the time we already bring paperwork up here to fill out.

I love you. See you tomorrow.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey babe. I'm glad you're finally asleep. And yes, I have been ducking upstairs like, every hour or so to check on you. You need your sleep, Kane! It's good for you!

Anyway. I've been chatting with our new boys and they're really good people. I can't believe some of the shit they've been through, though. People are fucking awful. Fucking hell. At least we've got their backs now. We'll make sure things only get better from here.

I love you lots and I hope you're sleeping really well.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey, so I've been chatting to Bruce this morning about further renovations to the office and stuff to make it into more of a real bedroom... he's totally happy to do it, and actually said he'll do it just for the cost of materials, no charge for his labour. I told him that was ridiculous, but he refused to listen. He said we all have to stick together. I might possibly have cried with gratitude a little bit at him about that.

He said he'll be back to start work on it in a couple of days - he's booked up for the next two days or so, in fact he probably shouldn't have really been here doing our shower for us, but he likes us. Pretty sure he's actually a saint. Saint Bruce.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Teasing] Kane, be proud of me! I'm a nerd like you now! While you are having an early night, I am playing board games with our boarders! [Bark-laughs] Oh man, that's a great pun. Shit, pretend, I did that on purpose, okay? Oh! Oh man.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Softly] You know... I love that you go to bed before me, sometimes. Because it means that every night I get to come up here and look at you while you're sleeping, and you're so beautiful. Then I get to slowly crawl into bed with you, and settle in and just listen to your breathing and... it's just, it's the best possible way for me to finish every day. I love you. And I'm gonna slip into bed and harvest your warmth now.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Teasing] I wake up to one beautiful, loving message from my boyfriend... and another, totally mean and uncalled for message from my boyfriend. You dare to continue calling me a nerd, when you're the one with the comixology account? You dare!!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Teasing] You know what? Because I always take the high road, I am going to respond to this charge of nerdery with only the most dignified of responses.

By which I mean, I'm going to bake a cake, and I'm going to write “Jason is a nerd” on it, and then I'm going to serve it to all our customers when you come downstairs today.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: You're currently in the shower and banned me from being in the bathroom with you, so I feel the need to leave you a very important voicemail in my own defense. First of all, comics are art. Second of all, no, I absolutely do not regret having to wash cake out of our clothes. Totally worth it.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 38 - Puzzle Piece

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Pickup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey honey, I wrapped Helen's birthday present and left it on your bedside table, since I know you didn't want me to give it to her without you. You can bring it down with you when you get up, I've planned the birthday tea party to start not long after you normally come down.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Softly] Hey honey. So... I'm about to fall asleep, but before I do, I just wanted to tell you once again that I love you. Today was really nice. Helen was so relieved you didn't plan some huge late night party for her, hah.

She's really come out of her shell a lot since she's been with us. It's so nice to see. She's so shy but everyone who meets her just adores her, and I mean, how could they not?

I don't think she expected so many people to be here today, even though we kept it low key... I don't think she really realized how many people love her until today. It's really nice that we were able to make her smile like that.

[Yawns] Oh... okay, I'm gonna crash out now. Love you. See you tomorrow.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Sweetly] I loved that message. I love you when you're sleepy, you're soft and nice. You should leave me bedtime voicemails more often. I love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey... I'm glad you liked my half asleep message. I'll try to leave you more.

Michael's giving Helen some casual painting lessons this morning... it's really soothing to watch, actually. I'm not the only person who thinks that, either - a small crowd of early risers have gathered around to watch. There's something really satisfying about looking at paint being mixed and used... it's like my eyes love the texture, even though I can't feel it with my hands.

Also, did you know that Michael's a really fucking amazing artist? Like... when he said he was an artist, I had no idea he meant like... a well seasoned and talented one. He makes it look so easy! He slings colours around and they practically come alive. It's incredible. I don't think I've ever seen someone with such skill - I can't believe he's not some world famous artist already, to be honest.

Do you think I should ask him if he'd be willing to teach some classes here? Judging from the small crowd today I think they might be popular... and I mean, art therapy is a thing, right? Like, it's good for mental wellbeing?

I might ask him about it when he's done with Helen.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Softly] Hey honey... you asked for more bedtime messages, so here I am. I don't really have much to say, though. I'm looking forward to Michael's art classes being a regular part of the Best of Luck's event calendar.

[Yawns] I really love our bar. We're becoming such a nice little hub of activity. I love it, I love the people that come to it. And I love you. Goodnight. I'll see you tomorrow.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: It's totally empty down here at the moment. Been a couple of weeks since we've had that. It's kind of nice actually... it's very calm and still down here. Everyone's asleep except for me.

It makes me kind of thoughtful, really. Like... I don't get solitude like this very often. I used to loathe being alone, but now... now it's kind of nice, because it's just a holiday instead of the default, you know? I'm not alone because I'm isolated, I'm just alone for a couple of hours tonight. Then tomorrow I'll wake up and there will be a flurry of people and activity again. Even in a couple of hours, I'm going to go fall asleep next to you, so not even my sleep will be lonesome.

I mean... I think that's why I partied so much, originally. Because it was a way to be around people, feel connected to them. I met people and made friends with them and for a little while, we'd all be coasting along life together, even if it was only a couple of hours. But then I'd go home and crash, alone in bed, and I'd feel... happy for all I'd been doing, but sort of sad that I had to go to sleep and wake up in the morning, if that makes sense? Or I'd go home with some random hook up, which would be great and wonderful at the time, but we'd wake up in the morning and it would be awkward and disconnected again.

Hmm... that all sounds a lot more depressive than it actually was. I didn't feel bad about it. It was just how it was, if that makes sense?

Well, anyway... that doesn't happen any more. Now I feel connected all the time. To you, to the bar, to our boarders, to our customers... I feel a part of the world proper now, instead of just... brushing up against that feeling when I experience something intense enough.

And it's not the magic thing making me feel this way, because believe me, I thought of that. But the magic is something else entirely. This is just... feeling my place in the world or something, I guess.

I have no idea if that made any sense, heh. Well, anyway, I love you, and I love going to bed next to you, and I love waking up every day and heading downstairs to see you. I love my new place in life. My puzzle piece fits very neatly into the world now.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 37 - Beacon

ROSLYN: This episode of Love and Luck contains references to homophobic violence. Please, take care of yourself.

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Pickup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey babe. I'm back downstairs again like a good worker bee. I actually stayed upstairs with you for a bit longer even after you went back to sleep, just to make sure you didn't wake up instantly again with another panic attack. I hope you sleep that one off and feel a lot better tomorrow.

I love you. I hate that this stuff is scaring you. Seriously, I would fucking end these arseholes that have been peppering hate around our neighbourhood if I knew who they were, I swear to god.

You know... you keep saying that you're weak for not being able to handle this shit, but Kane... no one handles this stuff well. Knowing people want us dead isn't exactly the state of affairs that makes us feel all calm and well adjusted. I mean... shit, that's the reason why we're both tiring ourselves out trying to keep the bar a safe and soothing place, you know? Everyone is scared. Everyone.

And... fuck, you're braver than most, in my opinion. Even with your anxiety trouble, you're still looking after people and making cupcakes and soothing fears, no matter how stressed or afraid you are yourself. That's... you're so amazing, you know that? You don't give yourself enough credit. This is exactly why everyone calls you Papa Bear. Because you look after everyone like this.

I love you. And I'm here when you're tired from looking after everyone else, okay? I'm always here for you. I'm here to look after you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey... so, I cried a little when I got your message this morning. Good crying though, don't worry.

I love you. You make me feel so safe. I feel like I couldn't be even half the person I am without you. The fact you think so much of me is just... I can't even express it. The fact you support me like you do is just... beyond anything I would ever have expected. You're... you're just the most incredible, supportive boyfriend I could imagine. Thank you for everything. I love you so much.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey babe. You seemed to get to sleep better tonight. I'm glad.

I know you don't want me out homophobe hunting again, so, well, I'm not. But... I feel like I can't do just nothing, you know? So I'm trying to strengthen the wards more and... add some stuff.

At the moment, we just soothe and protect people in here. But that's... not enough right now, I think. Apparently the posters have resurfaced, and people are still afraid, and people who have never heard of us at the moment might need us as a sanctuary at some point.

So... I'm going to try something. I'm going to try and use magic to draw people here who might need us, who might need this space. Like... some kind of magical beacon. Something that makes people feel, intuitively, that they'll be safe here, that they can come here if they need somewhere to be.

We can be a ray of light through this, for people like us. We can protect them. We do protect them, and we will protect them. We just need to reach out to the people that don't know they need us yet.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: The bar feels... sharp, this morning. Bright.

I love you for a lot of reasons and this is one of them. I try to comfort people, but my thinking shorts out around there. You think to bring people here who need comfort. I try to soothe people from harm they've suffered, but you try to put an end to the cause.

I love you, and I love the Best of Luck Bar. It's our home, but it's so much more. It's the home I always wanted to have... one that has room and care for anyone who needs it, one that has a family in it that takes in whoever needs it, that looks out for each other and stands up for each other.

You're right. We can protect them. And we will.

[Hangup]

[Dial Tone]

[Pickup]

JASON:

Hi, you've reached the Best of Luck Bar, a dry bar and social hub in St Kilda for the LGBTIQA+ community. Our opening hours are 9am to 3am every day except Monday, however, if there is an emergency, you can still come here outside those hours, as we, Jason and Kane, the owners, live upstairs above the bar.

If you feel unsafe for any reason, you can come here. We will look after you. We are a sanctuary for you in this time of bigotry. We're all in this together.

[Beep]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 36 - Michael

ROSLYN: This episode of Love and Luck contains references to homophobic violence. Please, take care of yourself.

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Pickup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey, I'm kind of worried about you. I'd really like you to come back soon, okay? I know you want to end this, but I really don't think that chasing after violent bigots is going to end well, you know? [Sighs] Just... come back soon, okay?

Michael is... doing as well as can be expected, considering everything. He's pretty bruised up, but I don't think anything is broken. I've given him some painkillers, and I used a bit of magic to help the pain too, as well as trying to soothe him emotionally.

I've told him he can stay with us, and that we'll look after him. He's resting in the other spare room right now. Helen's making us all some tea. She's really scared about this happening too, which is understandable. We're all looking after each other though. She's helping out with the bar while I've been cleaning Michael up and seeing what I can do.

Anyway... [Sighs] Please come home soon.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey babe, just calling to let you know I'm okay. We didn't find any of the fuckers who hurt Michael, or anyone who's been putting up those fucked up posters, so me and Victor are coming back to the bar now. See you soon.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: I'm so glad you're finally asleep... I wish you hadn't been kept up late worrying. But, well, it's too late to worry about that now I guess. At least you're sleeping now.

I tried to use luck magic to find the attackers tonight, but... I don't know. I feel like I got close, like I found a thread, but I couldn't seem to actually follow it. It's hard to explain. [Sighs] Another magic thing to practise, I guess.

I promise I'll check on Michael again before I head to bed myself. I love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey. Things are pretty quiet downstairs today so far.

Michael's not up yet, but that's not really surprising, considering everything. Helen made me breakfast this morning, bless her. She said she wants to help out however she can, even if it's just making breakfast.

She's so scared about all this but she's been so strong, too. I don't think she knows how comforting it's been to have her here with us through this. We should do something nice for her when we have the chance.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Fucking hell, news travels fast. Folks have already heard about Michael. It's a bit tense down here, everyone's a bit scared. Homophobic posters are one thing but... I think we've all been busy being happy in our community lately that we forgot that gay bashings are a thing that can happen for real, not just be a vague threat. Although... one leads to the other, I guess. It's not like violence happens without a foundation in bigotry first.

[Sighs] Anyway... people have been saying they feel better when they come here, so at least our wards and soothing are helping a bit. I'm going to make some more free cupcakes today, I think. We've got to remind people that there's nice stuff in the world too, no matter how frightened we are.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey babe, hope you're sleeping well. Things are going okay tonight. People are still pretty tense, but it's calm in here at least. I'm really glad we already had Lisa Skye booked to do a show tonight, it's really helping people relax. Hard to feel frightened when laughing.

You could really notice the fear come back into people when they walk out the door for the night, though. They stiffen and their expressions go hard. Vigilant.

Fuck, I really hope this shit blows over quickly and those arseholes never come back. Might take my boys out again tonight to make sure no more posters have reappeared. I love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey honey. Michael's doing better today physically, says the pain is almost gone now. But he's still really shaken up emotionally. He keeps sort of weeping and then apologising for it... I told him it was okay but I don't know if he believed me. I've been soothing him as best I can, and told him it's pretty normal and okay to be fucked up about it, and that he can stay with us as long as he needs and we'll look after him as well as we can. Again, I'm not sure he believes me... but I guess that's to be expected.

He cried on me for a while when I was telling him this stuff, which was a bit surprising, but it was good crying at least - relieved, grateful crying. We talked for a while. Helen's been supporting him too, as well as bringing him tea.

Did you know he's a painter? I think that's really cool. He asked if it would be okay if he bought some paints and canvases and stuff and did some painting in his room. He was really worried I'd say no, for some reason - I guess he's had tough landlords in the past or something? Anyway... I told him it was fine, and that it'd be really cool to see his work, and he perked up a bit at that. So that's something to look forward to, at least.

I love you. I'll see you when you get up.

[Hangup]

[Music]

Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

Lisa Skye is a real queer Melbourne comedian. You can learn more about her on Facebook, at facebook.com/thelisaskye. That's s-k-y-e.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 35 - Tension

ROSLYN: This episode of Love and Luck contains references to homophobic violence. Please, take care of yourself.

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Pickup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey... the flyers are still up today. Or... they're up again. I'm not sure which one it is.

Victor's stopping by the shops on his way in today and buying me some more flour so I can make extra cupcakes. I'm going to give them out for free today, I think. Oh, I should text him and tell him to get gluten free flour, too.

I... look, I know free cupcakes won't fix this. But... I don't know what else to do. Everyone is whispering instead of speaking normally, and staring at their hands in their laps, and I just... I don't know what else to do. I don't know if there's anything else I can do.

I've been soothing with magic, but... it's exhausting, and I can't seem to make enough of a dent in the depressive cloud over everyone's heads. So I'm just... trying to help keep everyone from falling into despair. Maybe when you're up when can try it together, maybe with both of us it will have a better effect. I don't know.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: So, I might be a bit tired when I get up tomorrow, or, well, today, because it's currently six o'clock in the morning and I'm only just heading to bed after I leave you this voicemail. I took my boys and we combed the neighbourhood, ripping down posters and pasting up new ones. Nothing inflammatory, don't worry, I know that would just make you anxious. We literally just put up cute drawings of animals and shit like that. So don't worry about that. We're not escalating the situation.

We didn't run into anyone who had a problem with what we were doing, which really is as fortunate for them as it was for us, because I swear, if I run into the pieces of shit posting this bullshit around, I will make them wish they'd never been born. Fucking bigots can go fuck themselves, this is our town and our area and I'll be damned if I let them have any goddamn power over us.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey... I hope you're sleeping okay. I might let you sleep a little more than usual today, since you were up so... late? Early? Not sure what the right word is in this situation.

People are still tense today, but it seems a little better, and once they settle in here at the bar they start to relax a lot more. There's been some talk of the posters, but it's not been particularly frightened, just sort of... wary. Oh, and a lot of very positive comments on the cute cat pictures floating around the area, hah.

I think we're making a difference, even if it's a small one. I love you. Thank you for doing so much last night. Oh, and I've set up a little tab for your boys for when they come in next too, for helping. It's not much, but it's something.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Oh, hey, this is cool - an author who writes some cool queer fiction just came in and asked about stocking her books with us! I said yes, obviously, and I tried to pay her for them but she just refused and said she wanted to donate them to us to support us. Apparently she's done this for Hares & Hyenas too, northside? I argued, but I lost. I'm paying her in coffee instead, at least she agreed to that.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Damn, these books Mary left for us to sell are pretty cool. That one called the Devil's Mixtape? I'm loving it. It's pretty dark, but damn, it's really fucking good.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: I stayed up too late reading. It's 6AM again. Fuck. Don't judge me.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Teasing] Oh, and you call me a nerd? When Mr Party boy was up all night reading young adult fiction?? Your secret's out, nerd, you're as big of a nerd as I am!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: This is a really good book, though.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

VICTOR: [Stressed] Hey, Kane? It's me, Victor. Look... I'm on my way to the Best of Luck bar because I'm not really sure what else to do.

I was heading to the shops and I heard all this homophobic yelling and shit, and after all those posters lately I just... well, anyway, I went to see what was happening, and these fucking arseholes were kicking this guy on the ground, while shouting awful shit at him. I yelled at them to fuck off and they ran off when they saw me. Fucking cowards were afraid of a witness, I think.

Anyway... this guy, his name is Michael, and he said he really doesn't want to go to a hospital or to the police or anything, because he's a refugee here and he's really afraid he'll get deported or sent to Nauru or something if any kind of authority so much as looks at him. Fucking government... making people afraid like this, what the fuck.

Anyway, he's hurt, but it doesn't seem to be like, life threatening, so I'm bringing him to you, okay? I don't... I don't know where else to take him. He needs to be safe and I just... you can help him, right? I don't know how but... I don't know. See you soon.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Victor is voiced by Darby Turnbull. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

Mary Borsellino is a real Melbourne author, and the Devil's Mixtape is a real book that she wrote. You can check out her website, maryborsellino.com, for information about her and her books. That's m-a-r-y-b-o-r-s-e-l-l-i-n-o.

Hares and Hyenas is a real queer bookshop in Fitzroy, Melbourne. Whether you want a coffee or a glass of wine, a good book or a hot magazine, Hares and Hyenas have you covered. They do live performances too. Basically, Hares and Hyenas is like, the cooler and non fiction big brother to the Best of Luck Bar. Check them out at hares-hyenas.com.au.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 34 - The Posters

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Pickup]

[Beep]

JASON: Oh my god, babe, I just made like, ten new friends and I'm absolutely in love with every single one of them. This group of girls came in for a hens night, right, and the bride to be, she's sober right? So we were the perfect place because we're a dry bar, and yeah, anyway!! She's marrying her girlfriend next week out in the Dandenongs and, man, it sounds like it's going to be a beautiful wedding.

I think I get it now when you were saying how weddings are nice. That girl was like, walking on air tonight, she was so happy. She told me all about her soon to be wife, like, to the degree that if I meet that woman it's going to be super awkward because I know waaaay more about her than she will know about me.

Anyway, we had so much fun, I may have helped the party along a little with some stupid antics and ridiculousness and it went down very well. I really hope those girls come back, I loved them. If you ever leave me I'm going to run away and marry all of those girls, okay? Okay!!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Amused] Hey honey. Glad to see you were still in bed this morning and haven't run off to marry ten girls - although, if you do, you can just keep me on the side, I don't mind the idea of having ten wives-in-law. It would certainly make household chores easier, to share the load with so many people. [Chuckles]

It's been a quiet morning downstairs at the bar today. We've only had, like, three customers, so it's mostly been me and Helen playing cards together to pass the time. Victor will be arriving soon, at least, so I'll have some company then. While he's here I might pop out to buy a few groceries we're a bit low on. Hope you're sleeping well.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Shaken] Hey, it's me. I... I'm freaking out a little right now. Um, I went out to buy a few things and... there's these posters that have been put up around the neighbourhood. Like, really... awful posters. They've got some... really homophobic and violent stuff written on them. I don't... I don't really want to repeat what they say right now. Maybe I'll be able to tell you later.

I'm... I'm okay, I think? I'm kind of fighting off a panic attack, but I think I'm winning. Um, but... I think I'm also going to wake you up for hugs when I get home. I just wanted to call you now, because that, that helps ground me. But... yeah. I think I'll wake you up when I get home.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey babe. I hope you're sleeping okay. I know those posters freaked you out a lot... I might actually go upstairs and check on you in a bit, if it gets quiet enough down here.

I've been strengthening the wards whenever I have a few minutes to spare, and I think I might try and add some knots to the twine on the door. I know the wards don't stop anything happening outside, but at least we'll be protected in here. It's a start. If the bigots come our way, they won't be able to hurt us or any of our people. We've all got each other's backs. It'll be okay. I love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey. Thank you for taking care of me yesterday. And last night. And again this morning. [Sighs]

I'm really sorry I've been so jumpy since seeing those posters. As much as I love cuddling you, I have to say I really don't like the part where I wake up in a panic. I also don't like waking you up, even though I know it's okay to do. [Sighs]

Well. At least things are good downstairs today. Even if my anxiety hasn't quite gotten the memo yet. But even through the anxiety, the bar feels comfortable and safe.

I love you. See you when you get up.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey, so... those posters are definitely still around, and I am not the only one who has seen them. A few folks who have come in this morning saw them, and are a bit shaken up.

A couple of your boys are going out to go rip down any they can find, so hopefully that helps ease things around the neighbourhood a bit.

People do seem to calm down quickly once they're settled in here, though. They definitely feel safe here. I feel like our wards are stronger than ever... you've gotten pretty damn good at this, huh? I'm gonna have to step up my game to keep up with you. I'm really glad you've been doing it though. Strengthening things, I mean. Both the general ones and the knotted doorway ones. Thank you.

I feel... I don't know. I have a bad feeling about all of this. Like this is the start of something bad. Maybe that's just the anxiety talking, I don't know.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey babe. Tensions started rising again a bit as the night's worn on tonight. We've had a few late comers who saw some of the posters - my nelly boys are out to find them and rip them down. I really hope they're ones they missed the first time and we don't have bigots putting them up as fast as we can take them down, that's a bit of a scary thought.

Anyway, I've sort of turned tonight into an impromptu open mic night, to try and get people to express themselves a bit and focus on each other instead of their fear, and it seems to be helping a little. There's some fearful on-the-spot poetry, but there's also been some dirty limericks and at least one workshopped burlesque piece, so I think it'll be okay. People are laughing a bit more again.

I'm trying to magically project some calm around but it's hard without making myself tired, so I'm mainly focusing on distracting people rather than soothing them, you know?

Anyway. I love you. See you tomorrow.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 33 - Jason's 30th Birthday

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Pickup]

[Beep]

KANE: Good morning honey. You're still asleep and beautiful. Also, you're not allowed in the office area out back today, something that I will repeat when I see you in person, so you can't just wander in and go "oh no, but I didn't know, I didn't get your message".

Victor and I are spending some time planning your birthday party today. So stay out in the front area of the bar where you can't get into trouble.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Jokingly] I can't believe you shooed me out of my own office and accused me of sneaking! I am an innocent soul who just needed to check some paperwork! And yes, maybe I don't remember exactly which paperwork, and yes, maybe I was being particularly quiet, but to accuse me of stealth? And eavesdropping? Like some kind of spy? I am wounded. My heart is broken that you would even think that I would stoop to such a low, low place as to try and sneakily find out what you're planning for my 30th birthday. Absolutely heartbroken. You've hurt me. Hurt me right in my soul.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Kane, I can see you a little bit when I duck into the kitchen. I can see you and Victor talking, I want to know what you're planning! Tell me!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: You both just started laughing. Was it good laughing or bad laughing? What are you laughing about? Tell me what's so funny, Kane!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Whiny] Kaaaaaane!! Tell me what you're planning!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: I cannot believe that you and Victor decided to do all this planning in person, with his physical notes, that he takes with him, instead of in texts or emails like normal people, just so I can't find out what you're doing!!

You may be asleep right now, but don't think that I haven't figured you out, mister. You're some kind of sneaky, evil mastermind. Sneaky and evil, I tell you. I cannot believe that I thought you were the mild mannered one in this relationship.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Kane, tell me what you're planning for my birthday.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Oh my god, you're such a brat. Just wait and see, brat. You'll find out what we're doing for your birthday when your birthday arrives.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Whiny] But I wanna know nowwwww!!!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Did I ever tell you that I love you more than anything else? In the whole word? And also that I think you're the most generous and kind person I've ever met? And also, I know that you love me more than anything else in the world.

And that's why you should tell me what you're planning for my birthday.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Kane, tell me!!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: I'm not telling you. But I promise that you'll like it.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

MIRA: Hey Papa Bear, it's Mira. We've been working really hard on the cake for Jason's birthday - or, well, cakes plural, I guess. The edible one and the cardboard one. Both of them are going really well, and will be all ready in plenty of time. See you Saturday!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

VICTOR: Hey Papa Bear, Victor here reporting in! All the performers are confirmed for Saturday. I had to jiggle the lineup a bit, but it's still a really good bunch of people, and Jason has seen all of them as some point and liked them, so that part of things is all done and ready! It's going to be a great night!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

VICTOR: Hey Papa Bear, I've just had a bunch of last minute RSVPs trickle in. We're still below capacity, thankfully, but only just. Good thing Jason likes crowds.

Also, I picked up the chocolate fountain today, and confirmed the photo booth hire with my mate, and I've still got time to go pick up an inflatable kiddie pool if you still wanna do the lube wrestling. Just let me know.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

HELEN: Hi Papa Bear, it's Helen. I just finished the last decoration, so they're all ready to go! I'll put them up tomorrow morning while Jason's still asleep.

Oh, and Jason's been barred from my room all night so I could finish up, so don't worry, he hasn't seen any of them.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: It's 12:01am, which means it's officially my birthday now, and you are, once again, cruel and evil for making me go to sleep tonight and not get any birthday things until I wake up tomorrow, which is technically still today.

[laughs] I can't even keep up the fake wounded thing right now. I love you. I'm so happy to be with you. Honestly, this life we've built together is the best gift I could have gotten, anyway. And yeah, I know that's cheesy, but whatever, it's true. You're the best. You're the best of luck in the Best of Luck Bar. I'm really looking forward to tomorrow. Or... today. Whatever.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [sings] For he's a jolly good fellow, for he's a jolly good fellow, for he's a jolly good fellow! And so say all of us! [Stops singing] Or, well, just me I suppose. All of us will say so later on today.

[Chuckles] It's officially your birthday now, particularly since you went to bed like a good boy. When you wake up you'll find a present for you on the bed in my spot. I hope you like it! Happy birthday!

I love you so, so much, and I'm really excited to throw you your party tonight. I know you're going to love it.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Well, it's 5am, and the last of the partiers are crashing on the floor downstairs, and I am just outside to get some fresh air and leave you a voicemail before I go back in and head up to bed and cuddle up to you.

This has been the best birthday I have ever had. Everything was perfect. I had so much fun, and and everyone else seemed to have so much fun too, and... god, this really was just... just perfect. Thank you. Thank you for this birthday, thank you for this bar, thank you for your love, thank you for this life. I am so happy to be with you. I love you so much.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Oh, one more thing - you jumping out of a cardboard cake for me was great, but it also lead to my one criticism for the evening. The fact there was no frosting to lick off you was a dire disappointment to me. So we will have to fix that next time.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Victor is voiced by Darby Turnbull. Mira is voiced by Tahlia Celenn. Helen is voiced by Yuki Izumi. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 32 - Helen

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey honey, just letting you know that Helen's here. I've set her up in the lounge for now since the spare rooms are still a day or two away from being ready. She only has, like, a backpack worth of stuff, so I've told her I'll buy her a few things at some point. Which reminds me, I'm probably heading out to look at beds today for the new rooms, so if I'm not here when you get up, that's probably where I am. Victor's going to be here this arvo though, so it's all good.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Quietly] Holy shit, Jason. Beds are fucking expensive!! I'm at the store now and I've been looking at these things, and like, fuck! I think I might just come home and scour gumtree for freebies or something. Yikes.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: So, uh, I think I just did magic by accident. I was looking over the doonas and pillows and stuff before I headed out, thinking about how expensive it all was and how I could really use a break, right? Well... I think I threw that feeling a little harder than intended, because the sales lady came over and chatted with me for a bit, and told me I could pretty much take anything in the section I was looking at for like, 80% off. Then on top of that, she gave me a bunch of freebies that were just slightly off or whatever so they couldn't be sold full price and were probably going to be turfed for like a buck or two anyway.

So, uh... yeah. Now I've got a huge trolley full of manchester that I paid barely any money for. So... I guess I'll get home... somehow. I mean, I won't be able to fit all this on a tram. So I guess I'll get an uber or something.

Well, anyway! We're set for blankets and pillows now, at least!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

[Drill sounds in background]

KANE: Okay, so you're still not up yet, which, good job on that since Bruce isn't exactly using a silent drill on our walls right now.

Anyway... I did another magic, again, kind of accidentally. I was chatting with my uber driver on the way home about the new rooms and why I was bringing home mountains of manchester, and told her about how beds are fucking expensive, right? While I was telling her that, I was feeling kind of frustrated - like all I want are some decent beds for crashers, you know, why is that so difficult? I was idly dreaming about stumbling across some beds on the side of the road or something while I chatted to her about it.

And I guess I threw it a bit, or maybe it was just genuine luck, because it turns out she actually has two spare beds that she's been planning to get rid of for a while, but hasn't gotten around to yet. She gave me her number and said that I can have them for free if I come pick them up in the next couple of days.

So... mountain of manchester for basically no money, and beds where the only expense is getting them from there to here. Pretty good, although I wish I'd been a little more deliberate with the magic. Because I am pretty sure it was magic.

Maybe this is a side effect from our practise? We're becoming more accustomed to using it, and our magic muscles are more exercised, so it becomes sort of... automatic? That's... mildly concerning, I don't like the idea of not being fully in control of it. But it's not like this stuff has been harmful, or changing anything, it's just been... well, lucky.

Anyway. I love you, and I'll see you when you get up.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey babe, I hope you're sleeping well. Bruce only just headed home - I think he's happy to be nearly done with our renovations and enjoyed getting to hang out for a while, heh.

I was chatting with him about the beds and he said he'd be happy to help us pick them up, no charge. He'll be back tomorrow anyway, so he'll chat with you about it then. I said we could throw a few bucks his way for it, but he refused - said we're doing good stuff and he's happy to help out. He's glad to know that if something happened to him or his ex wife, there's at least once place his kid can go where they'd be be welcome and not forced back into the closet. I suspect we will be meeting said kid at some point in future, hah.

It probably doesn't hurt that he has a soft spot for Helen, too. Although, I say that as if we don't all have a soft spot for Helen already.

Love you, see you tomorrow.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey honey, we called the uber lady and Bruce is here, so we're actually going to go pick up the beds, like, now. Not sure how long it will take us, but if you're up before we get back, that's why we haven't moved Helen into her room yet - we're about to bring back some stuff that we're going to shove into it first.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey, so I made an offhand comment to Helen about the incoming beds and how nice it will be that she'll have her own bed and room by tonight, and she had a little freakout about it. Not like, something we need to change anything for or anything, she's just... [Sighs] She's got some awful self esteem.

She kept saying that she'd be bringing bad luck on the bar or something by being here. I tell you, I really wanted to tell her that luck wasn't exactly something we ever had to worry about but... I don't think we're in any position to tell anyone else about our magic stuff yet. We'd just sound like nutcases.

I think she's been through a much rougher time in the last couple of years than she's let on to us. I told her that we'd look after her and it was okay that she's here, and I mean, she seemed to accept it, but she kept apologising and I just... fuck, you know? I hate that she feels so insecure about this. I wish I could do more to make her feel more comfortable here.

I soothed her a bit... magically, because, fuck, I am not nearly as good at comforting people naturally like you are. She's calmed down now, but I think maybe you should talk to her when you get home. You're a lot better at this than I am.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey gorgeous. It's 2am and it's dead quiet downstairs, especially since Helen's all moved into her new room.

I keep going to say you're magical in the way that you comfort people but, well... [chuckles]. I mean, you're good at it even outside of magic. She really seemed a lot more upbeat about stuff when she went to bed tonight. I hope we can make her feel safer as time goes by, too. I think some stability will go a long way for her.

And... I think stability is something we can and will be offering her, actually. I feel like she might be with us for the long haul, you know? I don't have anything real to base that on other than a feeling but... I don't know. Having her here feels different from when we had Victor, or Sarah or Mira.

Anyway. I love you, you're perfect and beautiful, and I'll see you tomorrow.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 31 - Mini Episode 3

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey honey, I hope you're enjoying your sleep in, especially since I suspect it's going to be one of your last truly good ones for a while, since Bruce starts on our renovations tomorrow. I promise I'll make you a lot of very good and very strong coffee. I love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

MIRA: Hey guys, it's Mira. Sarah and I just wanted to thank you again. For looking after us, and for helping us find our own place. We can never repay you fully for everything you've done for us, but if you ever need us, you just call. We'll make sure to bring as many people to the bar as possible, maybe help you run any ongoing events you might want to have? Anything we can do for you, we'll do it.

We're a little sad to be leaving before the renovations are done, but hey, in a way that's kind of good - end of this chapter, you know? You're going to be in a much better position to help any more people like us that might show up in the future. And I think they will - you're both too good, and the Best of Luck Bar is too good, for that not to happen. Besides, we'd kind of gotten used to the sofa bed, and I think it's better that the next bed we get used to is the one in our own room, rather than your spare.

We love you guys, and we'll be back frequently, so don't think that this is goodbye.

And thank you again. Thank you so, so much.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

VICTOR: Uh, hey guys, it's Victor. And, okay, so apparently I dialled the wrong contact in my phone, because I meant to call Kane, not the front bar phone. Well, anyway, when you've got a few minutes, Papa Bear, give me a call yeah? I've got some thoughts about Jason's 30th birthday party that I want to share with you.

Oh, and Jason? Don't even think about calling from Kane's phone, I'll know it's you. Remember that you were the one that wanted the details of your birthday party to be a surprise. It's too late to change your mind on that now.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

HELEN: [Nervously] Um... hi. My name is Helen. My friend Sarah from the trans support group I'm a member of told me about you. She... she said that you sometimes help people out who need it? I... I've been homeless for a while, and I don't know what to do. I figured... it couldn't hurt to give you a call. Um... I don't really know what else to say. Give me a call back, I guess, if you can help? My number is 0491 570 157. Thanks.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Mira is voiced by Tahlia Celenn. Victor is voiced by Darby Turnbull. Helen is voiced by Yuki Izumi. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 30 - Bruce

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey honey, so, remember how we were thinking of remodelling upstairs so we had a couple of spare rooms? I know we said we'd revisit the idea later when we had enough money, but I was thinking... I know we have a bit of money saved up, but we also have magic. And I mean... I know I'm the one who's always on his soap box about how we shouldn't use our magic for our own personal gain and all that shit but... fuck, I'd just really like to be able to give Sarah and Mira their own room instead of them just camping in our living room, you know? I don't know, I just... I don't feel like it's for our benefit, you know? It's for them.

Anyway... I don't really know, like... what we could do to find that extra money somewhere, but I'm sure we'll think of something. We'll talk about it when you get home.

I miss you and I'm really looking forward to having you home again. I hope the train home isn't too terrible, or that you're able to sleep through it if it is. Love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey babe! I'm on the tram on my way home from Southern Cross now, so I should see you in, like, half an hour or so if the traffic is good. God, Melbourne always feels like a big hug after being in the country, even if I was only gone for like, a day and a night.

Anyway - that's a good idea on the remodelling and, uh, I may have already gotten started on it. After I listened to your voicemail, I threw some feelings around and ended up making friends with this guy on the train on the way home.

His name is Bruce and he's a construction tradie, which, I know right? Anyway, Bruce and I were talking about the Best of Luck Bar, and he thinks it sounds like a great place and is going to come check it out tonight, probably, after he's had dinner with his kid, who is trans by the way, which is why he was so keen to hear about the bar. He gave me his card and said if we ever need construction work done, he might be able to swing us a good deal.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Okay, so, I was thinking more... actually, I don't know what I was thinking more, but I know that it wasn't "let's brainwash someone into giving us a discount". You know how I feel about that sort of thing!

[Sighs] Wow, okay, I'm sorry. That was a huge overreaction. I know you didn't do that, I just... I don't know. I don't want to get too casual about this stuff.

It's good he's going to come around to see us. We can certainly ask him about mates rates or whatever, without magic. That, I certainly have no trouble with. And I mean... you could have just bumped into him and gotten talking without magic, so I have to remember that too. By our own rules, it's fine. I'm sorry for being a dick.

Anyway... we'll talk about it when you get home. Love you. Sorry.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey babe. It kind of sucked having to come back downstairs again after you went to bed, but at least I got a few cuddles in before duty calls. It's so fucking good to be home.

I'm glad you're feeling better about Bruce now that you've met him. I told you he was a good guy. No magic required to gain his assistance! Just a good guy trying to do good, that I magicked my way into meeting.

It is pretty lucky is that he can start next week though - I wasn't expecting that, and no magic required on that one either.

I love you. And once again, it's okay that you got a bit upset today - like I've said before, you're the moral compass. I'll see you tomorrow. I hope you sleep well.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Hey honey. I do feel a lot better today, and I really do like Bruce. He really does seem like a good person, and I'm glad he's as excited about helping us as we are about improving the situation for our crashers.

And... I know you said it was okay, and I know I already apologised yesterday, but I just want to do it again. I'm really sorry for snapping yesterday. I know we talked through it, but I'm still sorry.

I just... I don't want to take advantage of people, you know? I mean... I know you don't want that either, but that's my point, I think that people usually don't intend to do anything bad but things just edge along until it's happening by accident. I'm just... I'm just scared that that's what will happen, that's all.

[Sighs] Sorry. I know I worry about this a lot. Probably too much. I love you. See you when you get up.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Hey, so, I just woke up and listened to your voicemail, and I know I'm about to go downstairs and see you anyway, but I wanted to leave you this message instead of just talking about it in person. Because this is really important, and I want to be, like, really clear about it. So I'll tell you this in person, and then when you check your voicemail next, you'll hear it again.

I like that you worry about the ethics of all this stuff. It's one of the reasons I feel safe exploring this magic nonsense with you. You're a really kind and thoughtful person, and you worry about this stuff before it becomes a problem. That's good.

You're a really good person, and you make me a better person, and I wouldn't change any of that. I might soothe some of that anxiety, but the worrying part, the part where you're keeping an eye on us and how we use this power? I wouldn't change that. That's part of what makes you someone trustworthy.

I love you, Kane. Worries and all.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Additional sound effects supplied by Kyle Evans. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.

Episode 29 - Engagement Party

[Dial tone]

[Pickup]

ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.

[Music]

[Beep]

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Groans] I miss you. I don't want to go to the stupid country, I want to stay home and hang out in our bar with you.

I wish I could have at least brought you with me! Although then the bar wouldn't have been able to stay open... [Sighs]

This train smells weird and I don't wanna be here. I miss you. Can I come home now?

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: I miss you too, honey, and I would love for you to come home but I think your sister might be a bit upset if you missed her engagement party.

The bar doesn't feel the same without you, but things are pretty good here. Sarah and Mira are helping out a lot, as much as I tell them they don't have to. They've been befriending a lot of customers too, which is really good actually because I think they're turning some occasionals into regulars. At least two people who've come in today said they came back because Sarah or Mira was so nice to them the last time they were here.

Also, the Papa Bear thing is starting to catch on big time, so don't be surprised if you come home and I've forgotten my real name, okay?

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Aw, don't worry Papa Bear, I'm sure I can get used to calling you that instead of Kane.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: [Amused] Hmph, not quite what I was aiming for. I should get the kids to come up with a name for you too so I can at least fight back.

Hope the party is going well. If I remember the invitation correctly, it should have started about an hour ago at the time of me leaving this message. Good luck!

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: Kane, rescue me. People are so incredibly straight here. I've had at least three people look scandalized when I said I have a boyfriend, and at least two women titter about it like I'm doing something naughty just by being in a relationship. Ugh. At this point I'm just drinking free booze and waiting for my suffering to end.

Oh good, speeches are about to start. At least now people will focus on that instead of trying to talk to me.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Oof honey, that sounds rough. I hope the speeches weren't too painful and the straight people stopped being weird around you. They better get over that thoroughly though, because I sure as shit am not missing your sister's wedding. I love weddings. And I love you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: You like weddings??? Seriously???

Weddings are a... outdated, sexist, heteronormative tool of the patriarchy! What the hell is there to like about them???

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: I mean, yeah, weddings are definitely outdated, sexist, heteronormative tools of the patriarchy. But also, they're pretty. Everyone is dressed up and happy, and there's good food, and people are in love, and it's a celebration of friends and family and community... I don't know, I think there's a lot to love about weddings. Even if they are, y'know, all the other stuff as well.

Oh shit, big group of customers just came in. See you.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Anxiously] So, uh... hey. Does this mean that like... marriage is a thing you're into? Like... is that a... thing, long term? Is it like... I mean... do you want to get married someday? Is that... do you want that?

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Freaked out] I mean, I'm not saying I wouldn't marry you if you wanted?? But like... you know, it kind of freaks me out a lot, and... I don't know, I mean, if it's important to you, I guess we can talk about it, or something? I mean... I really am kind of against it, in general, on principle, or whatever... but like... I mean, if you really wanted to get married, I guess I'm okay with discussing that? I think? I guess? Fuck.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Oh my god Jason, okay, no. No... that was... that was definitely not what I was trying to say. I like other people's weddings. I like attending weddings. I definitely do not want to get married. That's... yeah, no, that's not what I meant at all. That's not something I want. You can breathe easy on that front.

Like... I could imagine us doing it if we needed some kind of legal... whatever? But de facto couples get, like, almost all the same rights anyway, and... yeah, no. No, marriage is not something I'm chasing, don't worry.

I mean, it'd be kinda cool to have the big party, though. We already have a good reception place... Hey, should we advertise as a small reception venue for queer weddings and commitment ceremonies and stuff? That seems like something we should probably consider doing, huh.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

JASON: [Relieved] Oh my god, I have never been so relieved to receive a voicemail before. Like just... oh my god. My blood pressure is returning to normal, I can feel it. I love you, thank you for not wanting to get married.

I actually would have picked up if I'd noticed you calling this time, I was so anxious about the whole marriage question thing, but we did a maccas run before heading home for the night and I was in a very serious discussion about nutella donuts with my sister's fiance at that point. So, you know. I had my priorities right, obviously.

Anyway. That's a good idea about the queer wedding receptions. And I mean... don't get me wrong, just because I have... opinions about the institution of marriage doesn't mean that I have a problem with people doing something that makes them happy. I'm all for fancy cakes and pretty clothes and making out in front of all your friends.

[Sighs] I should head to bed. I have to be up at fucking sparrow's fart tomorrow to catch the train home. I love you. I can't wait to be back in our little queer bubble.

[Hangup]

[Beep]

KANE: Looking forward to having you home, honey. I hope you sleep well. Love you.

[Hangup]

[Music]

ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.

For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.